Your ultimate informer, Telusgh is here again to inform you about what is happening in Ghana through humor, here are some words with different meaning in Kumasi(#siano).
It's very funny but it reveals how creative Ghanaians are. Now let's go!
Jot
Original definition: To write
something down quickly. Also, a jot
is a small amount of something.
Siano version: Our definition deals
with a great amount of smoke indeed.
A jot is a cigarette. Tusker,
Rothmans, Embassy, you name it.
Why do I know these brands? Let’s
move on immediately.
Iron Boy
New definition: A younger version of
Tony Stark who was recruited by the
Avengers from a parallel universe,
when Iron Man was indisposed. All
this happened in Marvel comics, just
in case you thought it was actual
world history.
Original definition: Siano, we did it
again! Long before the Marvel Comics
of the world laid claims to this term,
we were using it to describe, as
GhanaWeb puts it, an up and coming
youth who feels on top of the world.
That’s what we the Akatakyie call the
Prempeh boys. It must be really cold
being on top of the world, North Pole
and all. If you have the Amakye Dede song playing in your head as you read this, don’t worry, you’re not alone.
Chisel
Original definition: A long-bladed
hand tool with a beveled cutting edge
and a plain handle that is struck with
a hammer or mallet and used to cut hard objects.
Siano version: I really love this term,
even though it is fading out of use. If a girl tells you you are chisel, then forget it, she’ll never date you! A chisel guy is a miserly one. It’s funny
but this word is hardly used on a
woman. If a woman refuses to spend
a lot, she’s careful with her money. If a man does same, he’s chisel. End of story.
Jack, John, Joseph and Charles
Original definitions: These are four
fine names for gentlemen. Jack is the
pet form of John. John in itself is a
distinguished name (and the go-to
presidential name in Ghana). Joseph
is Jesus’s dad so it doesn’t get any
better. And many a king has been
named Charles.
Siano version: Forget everything you
just read about those four names; we
have a different plan for them in
Kumasi. Fine, they are still popular
names over here, but they’re far more
versatile than that. Jack is a friendly
informal term used in addressing a
guy, especially a coequal. ‘John’ is
not something you want to be called.
It means you’re square, uncool,
socially inept, etc. It’s not pretty,
really. But don’t get mad if someone
calls you that, they’re probably just
messing around. Joseph and Charles
bring a smile to my face (and to
yours too, in case you already know
what they mean). Joseph is a friendly
term for a cat, and a not-so-friendly
term for the meat derived from it.
Similarly Charles refers to a pig, and
the pork it so generously provides.
These two are respectively said to be
delicacies in two different regions in
Ghana. However, because I nearly got
a good friend of mine mad at me
because of one of these terms (she
knows herself – Happy birthday,
dear), I’m going to move on real
quick.
Rough and Tough
Original definitions: Rough means
having an uneven surface. It also
means, of a person or behaviour,
violent or not gentle. Tough means
strong enough to withstand adverse
conditions, or, involving considerable
difficulty or hardship.
Siano version:
Help me out with these ones, if you
can. Inexplicably, rough, used as a
noun, means to tease someone, or
mess around with someone. Used as
an adverb, it means ‘extremely’ (quite
similar to ‘brutal’). Why? I. Don’t.
Know. Slightly more understandably,
tough means to be well-built, or to
have an admirably heavyset physique.
You can also say to a skinny dude,
“Wo y3 tough rough!” That simply
means you think they really rock. Lolx
Crown
Original definition: A crown is the
traditional symbolic form of headgear
worn by a monarch as a power and
legitimacy.
Siano version: Imagine this scenario
–You are in the room of the man or
woman whose affections you are
trying to win over. Someone cracks a
joke and you decide to laugh. At that very moment, your body conspires with the lunch you just ate, to
embarrass you like never before.
Thus, just when the laughter dies
down, you release a socially
unacceptable sulfurous gas,
accompanied by an even more
unacceptable noise. My brother, my
sister, woayɛ ‘crown’ kɛseɛ paa. Big
time. It is said that the term is a
mispronunciation of ‘clown’. I don’t. know if this makes it better or worse.
Feel
Original definition: Feel usually
means to be aware of something
through touching or being touched. It
also means to experience an emotion.
Siano version: The Siano meaning
comes close. But certainly not that
close. In Kumasi, if you feel someone
or something, trust me you’re
experiencing an emotion all right. But
not just any emotion. It is a strong
emotion of affection and desire. A
very tight one. Simply put, it can be
used just like the word love,
romantically or platonically. So
ladies, if a guy tells you, ‘Me feeli
wo’, don’t say he’s being too local.
Eye odo nkoaa.
Lie
Original definition: Come on, you
know what this word means, right?
Let’s move on.
Siano version: This is where it gets
confusing. This term has so many
meanings it’s hard to know where to start. First, it means to feel ‘some way bi’. If you’re feeling ‘lie’, it means you feel embarrassed, or
uncomfortable, or generally any
feeling that you’d rather not feel.
Lie can also mean a plan or a plot that you make with someone. Also,
describing something as ‘lie’ means
it’s cool and desirable. Conversely
‘no lie’ means unimportant and not
deserving much consideration. I’m
sure there’s at least one more
meaning. Lmao!!
Skin Pain
Original Definition: If this were a
common English phrase, it would
probably mean an intense and
unpleasant feeling that you have on your skin.
Siano version: In sheer Siano
creativity, this term is actually the
transliteration of the Twi word
‘ahoɔyaa’, which means envy. So,
you guessed it, skin pain in Kumasi
means envy. You can also say
general body pains, for a more
dramatic effect.
Guarantee
Original definition: A guarantee, under
any normal circumstance, is a formal
assurance that certain conditions will
be fulfilled.
Siano version: The ladies now want
us to call them platforms or wedges
or some other new-fangled name. But
we know better. Those thick soled
shoes will always be known as
guarantee, to those of us in the
know. Back in the day, as a lady you hadn’t ‘arrived’ until you turned up in a pair of guarantees. That was the way to make a fashion statement.
Moke
Original definition: An informal British
term for a donkey.
Siano version: These shoes are
known as court shoes or pumps
outside Ghana. But here, those names
just would not do. The first one
sounds a bit too legal. And then,
pumps are known to be devices used
to fill stuff with air. Calling shoes
with the same word, well that’s just
too confusing. So what did we do?
Why, create a new term, of course!
The word moke is made famous by
the scary urban legend of Madam
Moke. Madam Moke is said to be the
spirit of a dead teacher who wears all
red, including a high-heeled pair of
court shoes, or moke. She may be
identified by the clickety-clack of her
heels as she approaches. Yeah, and
she hates people, especially kids, so
if you hear her approaching, you
better run. Run, please, or you’ll die.
Chills course through my body as I
write this. Creepy. I think this urban
legend deserves its own post, in the
near future, don’t you think?
Apollo
Original definition: The Greek
Olympian god of light and the sun,
among other things. Talk about
pretentious. Also, the famous NASA
space program that resulted in the
first moon landing by the human race,
in 1969.
Siano version: Wise men say that
around the time of the Apollo 11
moon landing in 1969, Ghana suffered
from an epidemic of conjuctivitis.
That annoying inflammation of the
eye that makes them hurt and turn
red, scaring everybody in school.
Some self-appointed scientists also
vehemently insist that exposure to
moon rocks first caused this disease
and since then, the human race has
been seeing red. For those who fell
asleep during science class, yes,
Apollo’s ‘brofo din’ is conjuctivitis.
Write it down where water will not
touch it. Good thing it’s not so
common these days.
Crotch
Original definition: The part of the
body where the legs join together;
the groin area.
Siano version: This one has got to be my favourite. Word of advice – Don’t go to Suame magazine speaking of your car’s clutch and how it’s giving
you problems. In proper Anglo-Siano,
we don’t take into account anything
called clutch. It’s crotch. You know
that driving technique that suspends
the car in limbo, for easy take-off on
a slope or in a traffic jam? No, it’s not
half-clutch. Pay attention. It’s half-
crotch. It’s common to interchange
Rs and Ls in Kumasi, but crotch goes
beyond that. If you say clutch to a
die-hard Siano mechanic, he will not know what you mean.
Please, just say crotch.
So there you have it! Seventeen solid English words that mean something
totally different over in Kumasi. If we missed any of them, make sure you drop it in the comments, and let’s get
the conversation going. Terms like
half-crotch and others always bring
back good memories and a smile.
Sometimes, it’s little things like this
Ghanaian creativity with words thatmake me love this place so much.
Thanks for reading.
Wo ye capo paa! I love Ghana! #siano y3 guy
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